disgustedbyher

Mon, 25 Jul 2005 15:22:20 GMT

So I did well for a few days, then it all went to shit. I don't remember -why-, but it went to shit. Drinking a lot, snacking badly, eating chips instead of meals, McDonalds!!!

Well, back on it today. I'm having breakfast now.
And I have lean cuisines to last until paul gets back.

Thu, 14 Jul 2005 19:16:31 GMT

So things are going pretty well. Its getting easier to manage my calorie intake each day. Once i'm really comfortable with the lower calories, i'm going to try to count my carbs, too. For the most part, though, low calorie stuff tends to be low/no carb anyway.
The hardest part is the night time though. At night the boys eat chinese, pizza, chips, drink beer..... ugh

it's so hard to resist those things. I'll have a few chips just for the tast though, as not to deprive myself.
I'm trying to make myself understand that dieting isn't a punishment, but a trial of strength... something that will pay off after all of the hard work..
It will be nice to wear nice things for the boyfriend and feel good about myself.

Wed, 13 Jul 2005 15:38:07 GMT

170 this morning.
Biggest temptation/frustration last night was the BACON PIZZA that the boys had. I love pizza. But I made myself some crappy crap to eat anyway. It tasted bad but it was good for me.

Today I'm going to try and pick up something else good to eat... something that will taste good.
I found out that shrimp was really low cal... and i'll pick up some butter flavor cooking spray.

It'll work out.

Tue, 12 Jul 2005 17:49:03 GMT

I just ate a great meal that I made myself and I feel satisfied, energized, and proud of myself.

and my green tea came today...

maybe this will work out!

Tue, 12 Jul 2005 15:34:35 GMT

So i actually stepped on the scale for the first time in over a month today and i'm 172.5 :(

That could be because I just chugged a glass of OJ and I hadn't pooed yet, but this is really terrible...

This means my BMI is actually 28.8 which is close to obesity level.

on the lighter side, it means I can consume more calories than i thought originally....

my target is now

Calories 1542 cals
Carbs 175g
Fat 43g
Protein 113g
Exercise ~ 45 min
walk/day

But i'm just really trying to watch calories and fat right now. I should limit my starchy carbs, however.
I think I'll be off to the organic supermarket soon to pick up fruits and other things.

this is my weight loss journal

Mon, 11 Jul 2005 20:12:03 GMT

I created this journal today because I have a weight problem and I'm sick of being disgusted and embarrassed when I look in the mirror. I want to lose weight not only to look good but to FEEL good. My weight problem is causing severe bouts of depression that are getting out of control. I have no place to turn. When I ask my boyfriend for advice, he says i look fine. When I ask my mother for advice, she says it's genetic and I can't do anything about it. I don't have any close girlfriends to talk to about my problem.

stats right now:
20 yrs old
5'5''
165 lbs
I carry most of my weight around my stomach/hips

My low weight at this height was 140 lbs but I still was not happy with my body
I don't eat when I'm sad but I have a great love of food
I've been trying to eat 3 square meals a day with snacks in between
Sometimes my appetite is insatiable/unquenchable
I try to drink 2 quarts of water a day
I do not take vitamins
I do not step on the scale every day
I never exercise but I want to. I'm very lazy
I can't find the inspiration to get off of my ass

I think I gained most of my weight when i started birthcontrol over a year ago.

so far today i've eaten 6'' veggie delite sub from subway with some ranch dressing on it.
i have 3 more 6'' subs of the same kind for when I get hungry again. Honestly, I'm hungry right now. I have no idea how to satisfy my appetite without over eating massively.